I Studied, I Graduated and Then Asked “Now What?”

Can you see the fear of the unknown in my eyes?

Can you see the fear of the unknown in my eyes?

As I was putting the finishing touches on a blog post for a site I am a contributor on, I started thinking about where my head was at in college. I was a double major by default. By default I mean that I was never too sure what I wanted to “be” when I grew up.  I took the courses I HAD to, and flavored them up with courses that interested me. Then after a few years of that, I went to my graduate advisor and said “this is what I have, what do I do now?” He looked at my file and said that if I stayed a little longer and took a couple more classes I could get two degrees. I said, “cool” and went on my way. I took the extra time and graduated with two degrees by chance. But then what?

I took Spanish courses because I knew I could. I thought they would be easy since I am from Mexico. Turns out I had to study a lot; not so much the language, but everything else. I really did learn so much that I didn’t even know before.  I learned about literature I hadn’t read, music I hadn’t heard and history I probably heard from my family but didn’t pay attention to because I was a rude teenager that acted like she didn’t care. But now I do.  I want to keep learning and I want my kids to learn, too. If they are anything like me, they will dismiss me because I am mama and have no authority in those subjects. They already tell me that their teachers teach them new things that I know I have tried to teach them myself.  Somehow it just sounds better from someone else.  Karma, I suppose as I was the same way to my wonderful mom and very knowledgeable uncles.

Sure I had fun jobs and met great people along the way. I also had tedious jobs, retail jobs and marketing jobs. All of them have helped mold the person I am now, of course. But what did I spend all that time in school for?

My college years were not there to catapult me into a life of riches with the highest paying job imaginable. Is it ever? Way too many graduates are still searching for the job of their dreams.  I can say that what it did was open my eyes to the world. It helped me meet people from all over and stirred a passion for culture and tradition. Was it worth the thousands and thousands of dollars?  That will always be a matter of opinion but I am grateful for all I have learned in and out of school.

I never really got a job having to do with either degree and it isn’t until now that I feel like I am doing what I like. I’m learning to be a better mama (little by little) and I have started taking the cobwebs off of my brain. So the question is, when did you know what you wanted to be when you grew up? Did you know since you were young or are you still searching?

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